Giving Your Kids a Good Future

All parents have a universal wish to give their children the best possible future. There are many ways to achieve this goal, all based on four basic cornerstones:  Education, Finance, Spiritual/Moral, and Loving/Accepting home.  The future you build will be as different as the individuals and children involved.

Education

In today’s fast paced technological society, education is critical to success.  Choosing good schools for your children is worth your investment in time.  In addition, continue to provide educational opportunities in the home and the greater community.

Finance

The value of establishing a savings account for your child at a young age teaches your child about saving and delayed gratification.  In addition, saving for your child’s education gives the child a step-up, particularly if they can finish college without debt.

Spiritual/Moral

The essence of a bright future is the moral and spiritual values your child carries into the world. Not only will it shine through the character of your child, but it will sustain the child in times of difficulty.

Loving/Accepting Home


Children learn about relationships by imitating the relationships they see modeled. Of course, the relationship they see the closest is the relationship between their parents.  Ideally both parents live in the home with the child and treat each other with love and civility. However, not all marriages suceed, and when they don’t, the way you continue to treat each other has a lasting effect on your child’s self-worth.

Because of the effect of relationships on children in their care, many single parents use online dating sites like Parship Ireland. Here they find a wider pool of possible partners to choose from. In addition, online dating site give you a chance to talk to many people before deciding to meet anyone. Such sites also offer a compatibility test which helps narrow down the  acceptable possibilities.

There is no fail-safe formula for building a good future for your child. Life, like the weather, is unpredictable.  However, building a future on a good foundation is a great way to weather even the toughest of life’s storms.

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Milestones

An infant

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Your daughter is eight months old and still isn’t sitting up alone. The milestone charts say she should have by seven months. Should you worry?

Every baby is different and they all develop at his or her own pace. The milestone charts are simply a guideline- an average. If your child is slower at some things, she may be quicker to pick up another skill. She may be babbling way or walking before your neighbor’s child. Life tends to even out.

Your son may never be interested in crawling and may go from cruising around furniture to walking. Or, he may spend months crawling and not be very interested in walking. It can be very frustrating as a parent – particularly a competitive parent – but there isn’t much you can do to change it.

Babies have distinct personalities and learning styles. When one first time Dad said he thought they would have their daughter on their schedule in two or three days, all of his more experienced friends laughed. It took several weeks for him to realize that his friends were right, and he and his wife were adjusting their schedule to the baby’s – and they had no power over her.

Certainly, if you have concerns about your baby’s development, ask your doctor. For example, if your baby isn’t responding to sounds, she may need to have her hearing checked. It is a simple test and, at the very least, will give you peace of mind. If she does have any hearing loss, the early it is addressed, the better. You know your baby best and can often point out problems to your doctor.

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Family Meetings: Essential Parenting

Time is a novel notion — its hours often sought but never found, its seconds lost to busy afternoons. There are too many things to do and too few moments to achieve them all. Sacrifices therefore must be made. All duties must be examined, prioritized and rearranged; and the once valued family meeting is banished to the end of your long list of obligations. It’s deemed unessential and you choose to replace it with far more pressing matters.

This is a mistake, however — and one that must be corrected.

The concept of the family meeting is a familiar one: it’s meant to inspire communication, to allow discussions to occur in a safe environment. Too often is it refused, however. Parents believe that their time should be devoted to other activities — especially when their children present no obvious problems.

It’s all too common, though, for youths to shield their issues. Without the proper platform they may assume that they simply can’t: believing that their parents don’t wish to communicate. It’s estimated that over 70 percent of children who don’t speak regularly with their families (detailing important concerns) become involved with unwanted behaviors — such as drinking, substance abuse and more.

Family meetings are therefore essential.

Each week should offer the opportunity for children and parents to share information. These events should be scheduled for specific times (which will stimulate a sense of normalcy) and they should not be dismissed. Creating a routine will help youths feel secure with voicing their opinions and will allow the process to be successful.

A family meeting is vital. Time will simply have to be found to accommodate it.

 

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Achieving Equality: Parenting

eli & kim 7-12

Image by kimberly.ann via Flickr

Equality is the intention of all days: obligations must exist with pleasure; duties must be tamed by thrills. A life must be filled with all things necessary and all things enjoyable. This is the only way to secure happiness — and you strive always to achieve the perfect blur of balance.

Such balance must also be offered to your disciplining techniques, however; and the positive must be acknowledged with the negative.

Parents always seek to correct bad behaviors. They chastise children for the rules that are broken, offer the necessary punishments. This is to create a correlation between defiance and penalties; and it’s understood to be essential.

It’s not, however, to be singular.

While less than admirable traits must be dealt with, positive behaviors must still be offered recognition. When children accomplish notable tasks they should be recommended for them. This is a form of a reinforcement that will offer a far quicker connection — with parental respect becoming a wanted prize.

The purpose of discipline is not merely to chide. It is instead to inspire morality. This cannot happen, however, when worthwhile actions are dismissed (forgotten in the wake of one simple misjudgment). Balance must therefore be achieved — with parents willing to offer compliments and not just accusations. This is essential in helping children understand the value of behavior.

Discipline is necessary — but so is affection. The two are not mutually exclusive, defined to specific roles. Instead they must blend together to ensure that all children are receiving the proper care. Equilibrium must be sought… and obtained.

 

 

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Tone and Positioning: Communication

Juppentracht 08

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It’s an all too familiar argument: a collection of angry words and frantic breaths, the threats punctuated by disappointed sighs. You’re towering above your child — demanding to know why rules were broken, why a petty crime was committed. She has no answers for you, however. Instead she stares at the floor. Her posture is weak; her fingers are twitching; and she refuses to face your fury with an upward glance.

This is a situation defined by mistakes — many of which are spawned from your choice of words and looming position.

The need for discipline is vital. Parents must create boundaries for their children and must subsequently expect those boundaries to be maintained. Rules are essential — establishing structure and morality. Trying to prove the need for them through imposing postures and a loud tone is not recommended, however.

Children are formed of small bones and meager heights. The world therefore seems grand, and perhaps a little frightening, from their points of view. When parents choose to stand above them — shouting out accusations and demanding answers — the ability to communicate is lost. It’s replaced instead with anxiety. Youths will be unable to offer explanations. They’ll just be overwhelmed.

It is essential therefore that all parents — including you — become aware of body language and tone. All conversations should involve eye contact. This requires adjusting heights accordingly, allowing the levels to be even. Vocals should also be contained to stern, but steady, limits. Shrieks will offer no rewards.

This distinction will ensure that children are more aware of arguments, rather than being too nervous to comprehend the words.

 

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Communication: Parents and Children

Conversations are treacherous things — their demands are endless; their subtleties are many; and too often do you find yourself pondering words, wondering what your child’s seemingly innocent remarks could mean.

Brooding is not an effective form of parenting, however. Its results are too meager. Instead you must learn to communicate — allowing conversations to offer insights instead of concerns.

Ask Questions

Communication demands more than occasional smiles, the bland pleasantries. Parents must instead search for topics. Questions must be asked — even as they may seem too awkward or too demanding. Children will rarely venture information without first being prompted. The only way to gain answers therefore is to seek them out.

Listen to Responses

There are no certainties in life — and this is proven all too easily in the words children may offer. Responses may not be what parents desire to hear. They may instead cause horror, frustration or worry. It’s essential, however, to allow all answers to be given. Youths must be allowed to speak, rather than being forced to remain silent. This is the only way to create a dialogue.

Avoid Accusations

Anger is an easy emotion. It can spark with little effort, can steal all sense (with screams bubbling out again and again). This is not helpful, however, and parents must refrain from giving in to initial moods. The intention of communication is to solve concerns. That can’t succeed, though, if accusations are tossed about. All words must therefore be calm and reflect a desire to support.

Dialogue can be achieved. It simply requires initiative, patience and the ability to ignore emotional impulses.

 

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Expanding Education: Parenting Advice

An icon illustrating a parent and child

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It’s a trust in instructors, an assumption of schools and their intentions: your child is receiving an education, is being offered the necessary information. There is no need therefore for you to devote yourself to repeating the lessons. All statistics of drugs, sex and their concerns are being detailed. You are not expected to add more.

This is the assumption of many parents — a belief that all relevant facts are meant to be offered in a classroom, with a home then kept free of awkward conversations. Such an assumption, however, is wrong; and it can prove to be dangerous.

Children are echoes of their parents. They will chase after the examples that are offered to them, will mimic what they learn. Choosing not to discuss important topics therefore will encourage silence — with youths unwilling to question behaviors and more willing instead to try them.

It is estimated that children who do not communicate with their parents are three times as likely to attempt dangerous behaviors (such as sampling drugs or alcohol). This is because the lessons that were offered in school had no relevancy; they were presented merely as facts to memorize. The involvement of mothers and fathers, however, could have solidified the information — and made it seem important.

Parents must therefore be willing to converse with their children. Issues of health, bullying and beyond must be addressed — and often. This is to ensure that the truth is stressed, rather than simply ignored. Schools can’t be expected to offer all knowledge. Families must instead share the responsibility.

 

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Only Stickers Stand Between Mankind and Anarchy

Laptop stickers: it's all about freedom.

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Stickers aren’t just for little kids. Stickers are both fun and decorative. You see them on backpacks, laptops, scrapbooks and craft projects and on personalized greetings cards. Stickers allow you to express yourself. Convey your political leanings, social opinions or even cupcake preferences with the right sticker.

When it comes to sticker printing, the sky is the limit. Size, color, and style are all up to you. As for where to put them, here are a few suggestions.

Promote your Business

It might be for your new website, the hippest band in the city, or just a reminder to your existing pizza customers. A well designed sticker can set you apart and make your business’s name unforgettable.

Reward Your Kids

Give stickers to the kids when they do their chores, make the bed or go 10 days without an accident. Stickers are like gold to little ones. The promise of a sticker is usually enough to change behavior without the need for discipline.

Medical Needs

Stickers are one of the most essential medical tools in hospitals. They can verify the correct drug, identify patient charts, and even remind doctors of certain allergies to ensure superior patient care.

Office Supplies

Where would the modern office be without the right stickers? File contents would remain unknown and inventory would be all discombobulated. The finance department employ stickers to identify line items on the budget, account status and reminders of action items.

Scrapbooking

Ask anyone who lives in the scrapbooking world; stickers are essential. They add that little extra accent to the page and can convey the correct emotion at a glance.

Filed Under: Parenting